Pre-Birth Planning Sessions: Our Soul Contracts Before We Are Born

family looking at horizon

Soul contracts & Pre-Birth Planning

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Most of the content of this post can be found in my book Living on Earth: A Guide To Help You Achieve Health, Happiness, and Success

Have you ever heard of soul contracts? Or about our pre-birth planning sessions?

The idea that we planned our life circumstances and experiences before we came to Earth totally changed my perception of life.

Some of the struggles and difficult life events that had occurred to me as a child, and while growing up, started to make more sense.

There are two ways to see everything we go through; one as if every event is chaotic and random, and another as if they are not.

I understand that pre-birth planning is a difficult concept to believe, but not believing in pre-birth planning would support a theory that we are born in a human body at random, anywhere in the world, being born to whoever, difficult events that happen for no reason, and humans that come and go without purpose.

I believe our souls are eternal and have a plan, a life purpose.

This is the reason why we are inclined to be a photographer, or an accountant, or a stay at home mom. Our soul is born knowing what we want to accomplish.

I have learned that at some point between our reincarnations, our soul will attend a “planning session,” where it decides that coming to Earth is the ideal way forward to keep progressing on its evolution.


When we are not incarnated, we have the wisdom of the whole and we fully understand the implications of what we plan, especially when we give ourselves a seemingly difficult life.

Depending on the level of evolution of the soul, this planning session might be very straightforward or very complicated.

Each soul creates the life path that offers the best possibility for experiencing the emotions it seeks to understand and make peace with.

We don’t always plan difficult lives, but our soul knows that with difficult assignments we will accelerate our growth and we will achieve our karmic goals faster. However, we will never set up unachievable goals or take on more than we can handle.

Please note we also create with our actions and decisions on Earth.

Pre-Birth Soul Planning. General soul choices

Family of 4 looking at sunset in beach

Before coming to Earth we make every choice with our highest interests in mind:

• We choose our timeframe in history, including location and exact date and time of day that we will be born.

• We choose our name, which will assist our soul’s learning. The name is given by the soul to the mother and/or father telepathically.

On rare occasions the parents might choose not to listen.

• We choose our parents, immediate family, and close friends (including our socio-economic class), and significant romantic and business partners.

We often choose to reincarnate with the same family members (or group) but in different roles. A soul that was a sibling in a past life could be our daughter or father in this one.

• We choose if we will be adopted or be naturally born to our mother.

There are various reasons why a soul might choose to come to Earth via adoptive parents.

For example, the adoptive mother might know that her body will not be able to conceive, and requests a family soul member to be her adopted child in her next lifetime. The adopted child’s soul might want to experience adoption or be of assistance to her soul.

In most cases, not having blood ties doesn’t make the bond any weaker for they are still part of the same soul family.

• Within our family, we choose lineage intent. What that means is that we choose a family that will support our intent; for example, being born to a family with many generations of doctors if we wish to be one.

Or quite the opposite, we choose a family that will not support our intent because one of our primary life lessons is to stand up for ourselves and fight for who we want to become.

• We choose our gender and sexual orientation.

Our soul is androgynous; it is probable that we will all choose to be either sex, man or woman, or gay or lesbian, at some point through our many reincarnations, because we learn the most through duality and experiencing both sides of the spectrum.

• We choose our physical attributes.

The soul knows the health of the baby in the uterus. If the baby’s health, or lack of, won’t serve the soul’s purpose, then the soul will not choose that body and will choose another one.

This includes genetic issues – being born with Down’s syndrome or cystic fibrosis – or propensity issues, being thin or fat, having headaches, etc.

• We choose the main aspects we want to work on, such as tolerance, patience, poverty or wealth (in some cases, both poverty and wealth in the same lifetime), self-respect, or coping as a single parent.

The Law of Balance and Polarity says that we are always seeking balance, and for that reason we experience opposites in order to learn from them.

Balance seeking balance - two balls in scaleSome people are extremely wealthy or poor, generous or greedy, loving or unloving.

By experiencing opposite sides of a spectrum over many lifetimes we aim at finding the perfect balance.

Understanding this law and putting it into practice means that we can look inwardly to what aspects we think we are off balance and try to rectify them.

• In most cases we build some adversity into the life plan, along with the tools and people to assist and teach us.

It is through our life challenges, and how well or badly we handle them, that our soul has decided to evolve.

We will not have experiences that don’t contribute to our knowledge and have not been agreed upon us.

Lessons that have been learned in the past will not be presented again.

Comet going around the earth in the universe

Planning our lessons and adversities doesn’t mean we are destined to experience all the fear and pain they might cause; suffering is not strictly necessary because we also planned the solution (in the form of mentors, understanding how to use our intuition, books, and knowledge).

I think this is the reason we are seeing so many more spiritual and self-help books in the market, and why doctors such as Dr. Weiss and Dr. Newton are finding and releasing information about our pre-life choices (please see recommended books at the end of this post).

Although we will always have free will, we can also start having a deeper understanding of who we really are, how to take responsibility, and how to live a more joyous and fulfilling life.

Instead of becoming suffocated by our circumstances, with this understanding we can heal and transform our challenges.

  • We will make agreements with other souls who will help us master the main aspects we are going to work on. We knew the potentials of everything we have gone through so far.

• We will also understand how major life events that we can’t change are going to affect us; for example, the death of our parents or a close friend, or other events that will come at some point in our life.

When they die, that is the perfect timing for their chosen path, and there is nothing we can do about it. But how we handle the situation is up to us.

• Our soul decides how much karma it will create and how much it will balance and release.

Buddha holding karma sign

Our soul will make arrangements with the other souls involved in order to achieve this.

We also have free will, so we can choose to balance and release much more or less karma than we originally planned.

• Last but not least, we define a number of exit points for when we will leave our human body, and when these points come up we will choose whether we wish to take them or not.

Sometimes we plan our death to bring great blessings to the world or to make some kind of statement.

Examples of soul contracts and pre-birth agreements

The grace of God is a wind which is always blowing. Sri RamaKrishna

Our souls plan painful experiences because in a broader sense our soul is unafraid of any challenge.

We know that we can’t get hurt because we are eternal and there is nothing that can happen that could threaten our soul.

We know that our potential painful experiences will assist our soul’s evolution and understanding in life.

Sometimes we also want to balance and release karma.

As difficult as it might seem, all our experiences have a purpose and we have created them, either through pre-birth choice or while on Earth; otherwise, they wouldn’t exist.

The following are some examples of pre-birth choices and agreements. You can find many more in the books I recommend at the end of this post.

1. Bump contracts

A person agrees to intersect at a moment in our life to check how we are doing and if we are following the path we set ourselves prior to birth.

Sometimes we get distracted, or simply lost, or too depressed.

These contracts often come with great intensity and leave a great mark in our lives; a short-term lover or a helpful friend who gives us the best advice we ever needed.

It isn’t always traumatic, but the experience will give us the opportunity to get back on the path we were supposed to be on (although we might not take it).

2. Transition contracts

We made agreements with the souls of people who will help us cross over.

This could be a nurse or a family member.

3. Altruistic lives

This refers to lives planned solely to assist other human beings, a situation, and/or the earth.

The soul might have chosen that life to raise awareness.

4. Choices made depending on soul evolution

Some very young souls come to Earth only for a brief period of time to experience life in a human body.

In these cases, the soul might just choose a short life in a developing country and there is no more planning involved. Or an evolved soul that has had thousands of lives on Earth might only have a few lessons left to learn.

If the soul chooses a longer life, the planning is much more complicated as there are only specific places, types of parents, times of the year, and many other attributes that would meet all of the soul’s pre-birth requirements.

5. Contracts with pets

We also make agreements with our pets prior to incarnating. Robert Schwartz has a blog post about this. You can also find it in his book Your Soul’s Gift.

Your soul's gift book cover by Robert Schwartz

Schwartz shares the story of Marcia, who chose before coming into her body to be a dwarf. In this lifetime Marcia is but 1.4 meters (less than 5 feet) tall.

Marcia knew before she was born that people would reject and dismiss her because of her height, so she built into her plan a safeguard: she would always have the unconditional love of her pets.

6. Other

There are countless other agreements and lessons. Please see the recommended reading section at the end of this blog post if you wish to read more about pre-birth life choices and agreements.

We continue to make soul contracts and agreements once reincarnated

Once reincarnated on Earth, we are subject to the spiritual laws of the universe.

I have established Laws in the universe that make it possible for you to have —to create— exactly what you choose. These laws can't be violated, nor can they be ignored. You cannot not follow these laws for these are the way things work.Neale Donald Walsch

I have established Laws in the Universe that make it possible for you to have—to create— exactly what you choose. These laws can’t be violated, nor can they be ignored. You cannot not follow these laws for these are the way things work. —Neale Donald Walsch (Conversations with God)

We create by following these laws, consciously or unconsciously, but we can also still make agreements with other souls in our sleep.

I want to point out that we also create a lot of our current challenges by not using our intuition and our better judgement.

That is, we might not have planned a specific car accident, but if we continue to drink and drive that could be a natural consequence of our poor choices.

I have explained how the Spiritual Laws work to create our reality in these posts:


Pre-Birth Planning and Soul Contracts Book recommendations

To close out this blog post, I’m recommending below what I perceive to be the best books should you wish to expand your knowledge about pre-birth life choices and soul agreements, but I have not found one single book that deals with one issue only.

All the books that I have read cover a range of agreements and lessons. For reference, if relevant I have added their table of contents:

Your Soul’s Gift, by Robert Schwartz

Table of contents: Healing, spiritual awakening, miscarriage and abortion, caregiving, pets, abusive relationships, sexuality, incest, adoption, poverty, suicide, rape, and mental illness.

Your Soul’s Plan, by Robert Schwartz

Table of contents: Physical illness, parenting handicapped children, deafness and blindness, drug addiction and alcohol-ism, death of a loved one, and accidents.

Journey of Souls, by Michael Newton

Destiny of Souls, by Michael Newton

Same Soul, Many Bodies, by Brian Weiss

Do you have any questions?

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